
Photo of the Day, 3/11



I feel the need to keep reminding people that the Phillies were actually a 96 win team last year that won their division by a lot. If they’re “running it back,” which they really aren’t, that’s not a bad thing. The Mets maybe improved a bit on paper from last season, but it’s only a bit given the key players they let walk out the door to begin with. The Braves could get bounce back years from some of their best players, but so far in camp they’re losing players to injuries and suspensions. No, the Phillies didn’t sign a ton of new free agents, but given the young talent arriving and the few players they did bring in, I think you have to be trying to find fault with them to not pick them as at least a prohibitive favorite in this division.
Now, with all of that said, you don’t win the division in March. You pick a team in March. The question is, how does this team compare to the 2025 one. That may depend on if we’re talking about the Opening Day team or the playoff team, but the question remains. I’m going to walk through that a bit here.
The Line-Up
SS- Trea Turner
DH- Kyle Schwarber
1B- Bryce Harper
3B- Alec Bohm
LF- Brandon Marsh
RF- Adolis Garcia
C- J.T. Realmuto
2B- Bryson Stott
CF- Justin Crawford
Ok, so absolutely no shocks at all here. My guess is that on days where Otto Kemp is in left instead of Marsh, Garcia and Realmuto will move up and he’ll slot seventh. I’m expecting some regression from Schwarber (I’d be shocked if he hit 56 homers again), but nothing major- he still hits well over 40. I expect a similar season from Turner to last season, at least offensively, but his defense will probably regress. I’m expecting a big season from Bryce Harper, and he’s not off to a break neck pace so far. From there I expect pretty much career norms from four through eight. None are truly bad players, they probably all end up in the range of 2 WAR or better, but none are competing for All-Star nods or MVP’s. Then there’s Justin Crawford. I’m going to keep saying how much I like him, and I think others will eventually join. No, I don’t think he’ll ever hit 30 homers. I do think he’ll continue to grow into a double digit homer guy, and I think you’ll all see that he sprays a lot of extra base hits in the form of doubles and triples. If he’s hitting .300 and swiping 30 plus bags, I think he’s a real asset.
Rotation
LHP Cristopher Sanchez
LHP Jesus Luzardo
RHP Aaron Nola
RHP Taijuan Walker
RHP Andrew Painter
The backbone of this team remains pitching. Sanchez looked rusty in his first WBC start, but looks healthy. Luzardo got paid, and that’s good for everyone. I don’t see Sanchez regressing at all this season. Luzardo did have the best year of his career last year, which makes you think he could, but he also had a half dozen starts that prevented him from contending for the Cy Young, and he could improve on that. The success of this staff is really what happens after those two though. Nola has looked outstanding so far, which has me quite excited. Walker just threw very well for Mexico in the WBC, but I think it’s fair for us all to assume he’s a fifth starter type. Painter has had really, really good results so far. His delivery looks like it did pre-Tommy John, which is really good. He has not missed many bats so far this Spring though, and that is my one pause for concern. As long as one of these three is pretty good and another is a league average five, the staff should be fine though. Zack Wheeler is back throwing bullpens and on target to be pitching by May, meaning he may throw a full month more than last season. Obviously we need to see how he’s doing at that point, but if he’s 85% of the Wheeler we had, the rotation is very, very strong again.
The Bench
C Rafael Marchan
INF Edmundo Sosa
INF/OF Otto Kemp
INF/OF Dylan Moore
I think that Sosa and Kemp are locks to make this team. I think Sosa will continue to be who he has been since he got here in 2022, which is a very good utility player. Kemp is going to get his chance to answer the question of “what he is,” as I think we’ll see him face lefties in left field and accumulate several hundred MLB plate appearances this year. I have Marchan beating out Stubbs for one basic reason- Stubbs can’t hit at all. Neither is going to be an offensive juggernaut, but if you really want 40 or 50 starts from the back-up catcher this year, there’s no responsible way you go with Stubbs. The last spot is a tough one. Topper has said he wants versatility, so I’m taking Moore over Bryan de la Cruz. If I were the GM, I would go the other way. The last guy shouldn’t really get many starts anyway, so I’d rather take the guy I’d be happier with getting plate appearances as a pinch hitter. He also could take some starts in left, though I don’t think the Phillies really want that.
Bullpen
Closer Jhoan Duran
Top Righty Set-Up Man Brad Keller
Top Lefty Set-Up Man Jose Alvarado
Righty Set-Up Man Orion Kerkering
Righty Reliever Jonathan Bowlan
Lefty Reliever Tanner Banks
Lefty Reliever Zach McCambley
Righty Reliever Zach Pop
This seems to be a battle between McCambley, Pop, and Kyle Backhus, with Max Lazar and Seth Johnson on the edges with Lou Trivino and Tim Mayza. I’m taking McCambley and Pop because they have to make the team, or be gone. In the end, they’re going to be throwing mop up innings anyway. The front six in this bullpen are going to be very good. Remember last year, with Romano, Alvarado, and Strahm opening the season as your top three arms? Keep your eye on Bowlan, who appears to be a late bloomer. Last year as a rookie, he was one of the top rookies in opponent batting average. He can give you length and he’s good at limiting solid contact. I’m expecting good things.
Next time out I’ll try and predict the IronPigs as well. I’m not sure how or why people are looking at this roster and predicting a huge drop off from last year’s 96 wins? The Braves are a busted mess and the Mets bullpen will kill them, assuming they don’t miss Pete Alonso too much first. This team basically looks like they’re as better as Crawford and Painter make them, and I think that was always the plan. The Phillies have refused to move these prospects for several years, waiting for this point. I think they’ll be pleasantly rewarded for that.

It’s 70+ degrees outside. Even a month ago, this was unthinkable. Then again, everything on our television right now was unthinkable a couple years ago, so keep perspective, folks.
So anyway, the news… yikes. In the biggest news in the world, Big Foot is apparently in Portage County, Ohio. While I’d like to call this crackpot shit, apparently their are footprints of a very large individual in the areas he was “seen.” In very similar news, Texas, North Carolina, and Arkansas had their primary elections last Tuesday. In the premier races of the night, James Talarico won the Texas Senate Democratic Primary and John Cornyn and Ken Paxton are heading for a runoff on the Republic side. You may recall that Paxton was literally indicted for securities fraud and investigated for abuse of office, but hey, that seems like Senate material for me. Meanwhile, human shitstain Congressman Tony Gonzales has withdrawn from his re-election after finishing first with 43%, but failing to avoid the runoff. You might re-call that Gonzales had an affair with aide Regina Santos-Aviles and she ended up committing suicide by lighting herself on fire. It’s amazing that 43% of the people voted for him. Of course, Gonzales was the “moderate” in this race, as his opponent, Brandon Herrera, wants you to know that he is the proud owner of a 1939 edition of Mein Kampf. Meanwhile in North Carolina longtime dictator President of the North Carolina Senate, Phil Berger, is trailing his primary by 23 votes for re-election.
Moving from the profoundly stupid to the merely dumb, Taylor Lorenz, someone that younger people apparently made into a famous culture reporter, is in fact a moron, and has no idea who is paying her. In New York City, some Hamas-loving, loser children tried throwing an explosive device at protestors they disagreed with and got arrested after it failed to blow up. First off, these kids are too useless to even get terrorism right. Second, it turns out they had very wealthy refugee parents here in Pennsylvania. The Democratic National Committee is basically broke, which may be good news for Democrats. New polling suggests that Democratic voters think the Democratic Party is insane, which is completely true. Donald Trump has appointed Erika Kirk to the Air Force Academy Advisory Board, because… idk. The National Cancer Institute hasn’t made a single grant this fiscal year. For real. And there’s this guy, Professor Jiang over in China, who thinks Jewish people created Islam, or at least says that. He also thinks 20% of white American girls in their 20’s are on OnlyFans. He has 2,000,000 YouTube followers. The internet really was a mistake.
The World Baseball Classic is underway, and there are no shocks so far. The United States, Japan, the Dominican Republic, and Puerto Rico are all good at baseball. Kyle Schwarber and Aaron Judge can hit a baseball very far. Paul Skenes is good at pitching. The biggest surprise of the tournament is Cal Raleigh stiffing Randy Arozarena when he tried to shake his hand (they’re teammates on Seattle) and Arozarena ripping him after the game. I’m with Arozarena here. In other sports news, it’s conference tournament time in NCAA Basketball. For my money, I’m taking Michigan (Big Ten), Duke (ACC), UCONN (Big East), Florida (SEC) and Texas Tech (Big 12) to win the major men’s conferences. Some of the women’s tournaments are already done, but if you’re filling out your bracket, you can pick UCONN and South Carolina to win almost any game they play. Closer to home here in Pennsylvania, Penn State won yet another Big Ten Wrestling title this past weekend and their media starter has like 1.5 losses on the season, so they should win another national title. In closing, sad news, the “Exciting Whites” broke up in Philadelphia, as Reed Blankenship has moved on. This is life as an NFL fan. Your team wins, your players start getting paid the real money to go elsewhere.
Is there other news? Oh yes, war with Iran. American and Israeli bombers killed the Ayatollah and many other leading religious radicals in the country. What has commenced is essentially a regional war of damn near everyone in the region against Iran, Hamas, Hezbollah, and some rebels in Yemen. Of course, this is making weird bedfellows, as Pakistan has pledged to defend Saudi Arabia, who is on the same side as the United States and Israel, even though Pakistan is fighting Afghanistan right now, and just a few years ago Americans entered Pakistan to kill Osama Bin Laden. Even more telling- Trump doesn’t seem to have any plan for who will now take over in Iran, assuming we can even topple the IRGC that are still in place. Remember all that talk in 2024 that a vote for Kamala would lead to war? Oh yes, the good ole’ days.





Bob “Crooksy” Brooks is running to be the Democratic nominee for Congress in PA-7. He even filmed a commercial with Pete Buttigieg this week in a cigar bar to give you the sense he’s a middle class guy (It’s a great cigar bar, I recommend it). One has to wonder though, does Crooksy even like Buttigieg? We know he doesn’t like President Obama. Brooks personally announced the Pennsylvania Professional Fire Fighters Association was not endorsing Kamala Harris. I wonder why? Crooksy really doesn’t seem to like other Democrats, unless they’re endorsing him.
Maybe Crooksy is running in the wrong primary. He loves religious radicals and gun nuts. He really doesn’t think Democrats know how to talk to working class people. Most importantly though, Crooksy loves election denying Republicans. He made sure to personally repost social media posts from his union praising Republican State Senators Mike Regan and Camera Bartolotta. Regan was named in a report for spreading election denial conspiracies. Bartolotta signed a letter to Senator Mitch McConnell and Congressman Kevin McCarthy asking them to delay certification of the 2020 Election. Bartolotta currently sits on the Senate Judiciary Committee in Harrisburg, as well as the Rules & Executive Nominations Committee. She is an election denier when it’s convenient for her. Crooksy is fine with this.
Look, I know most of these GOP legislators are just doing this to keep their jobs. Adherence to “Dear Leader” is a requirement in that party, and both of these folks probably pushed this shit to stay on the right side of the local MAGA Juntas, or local GOP committees (didn’t work for Bartolotta). The problem here is the hypocrisy of Crooksy. He personally made it a point to not endorse Vice-President Kamala Harris as leader of his union, which is certainly his choice, but he’s giving cover from that same post to people who were giving cover to people in the nut house, denying the 2020 election. Now he wants to run and claim he’s some leftist that will take back the working man. Crooksy is just the new John Fetterman, right down to the hoodie. What a shame that Buttigieg is covering for this fraud.




